16 Weeks and a Getaway

Sorry for the lack of updates. Things are going well. Nothing to report (which is always a good thing!). I go back to the high risk doctor next Tuesday and then to my regular OB on the 1st. We check Ella's heartbeat daily and it is such a beautiful sound! I'm 16 weeks along (17 on Sunday).

If you think about it, will you please pray for my brother and sis-in-law as they go back to the fertility specialist on Monday? They found a few cysts on Esther's ovaries last time she was there and we are praying they will be completely gone!

This past weekend was a great get-away for us. My friends, Lori and Jeff were going to Pigeon Forge for the weekend. Jeff's parents have a time share there and they had to cancel, so they were letting Jeff and Lori use it. My other friend April and her husband, Dan were free for the weekend and so were we (which is rare for us since David always has to lead worship on Sundays...but Brien was leading this week!), so Lori invited us to stay at the time share with them. It was a nice 3 bedroom condo, so it was perfect. April, Lori, and I went to middle school and highschool together...we've been friends for nearly 18 years! (Wow that makes me feel old!). I've never gone on a trip with them so it was nice to just hang out and get to talk with them. They have really been great support for me since we lost Noah and it was nice to be able to share with them the joy of being pregnant with Ella. They are such genuine people and I love them dearly. It was also nice to get to spend some time with their kiddos.

Here are a few pics from the weekend....
















Sadly, I didn't get a pic of David, Ethan, and me together. Bummer.

Anyway, it was a great time with friends and a good inexpensive trip for us. I really wish we weren't so spread out (Lori lives in Greenville, SC, April lives in Nashville and of course we live in east Atlanta), but I'm glad we have remained good friends through the years.

6 Years Ago Today

October 15th is Pregnancy & Infant Loss

Remembrance Day

It was 6 years ago today that our journey with pregnancy loss began. You can read about that day HERE. At the time we had no idea that we would face more loss in the future.

Tomorrow is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Please remember those who have lost, whether it was recently or a long time ago. As my grandmother would tell you, even if the loss was over 50 years ago, it can still be so difficult....you never forget.

It's A Girl! ...What's in a Name?

Today I went to get my hair cut and I was telling my friend who cuts my hair that we were pretty sure our baby was a girl but didn't have a really good look yet. She has a friend who is an ultrasound tech (the same one who did Noah's gender scan for us), so she called her up and asked her if she would have time to do an ultrasound to confirm our baby's gender today. She said she would be happy to, so I stopped by her work around 3:00. It took a few minutes, but we finally confirmed IT'S A GIRL! She was moving all over the place, but she had her little legs tightly closed. Finally after several minutes of me rolling from one side to the other, we were able to see and she is definitely a girl...

Here she is sucking her thumb (just like her big brother!)

And here she is already showing her support for the "#1" football team in the country (Alabama Crimson Tide!!!). She's holding up a "#1".

What's In A Name?

As for baby girl's name.....we have chosen Ella Jane. "Ella" is a form of the name "Helen" which was both mine and David's grandmother's name. I absolutely love the meaning of the name because it is so appropriate for how we feel about her ...especially after losing Noah and all that we've been through in the last year. It means "torch or bright light" or "a torch in the dark places". The name "Jane" is the name my other grandmother goes by (her real name is "Mary Jeanette" but she has always gone by "Jane"). This name means "God is gracious". We feel like this is the perfect name for our sweet miracle baby!

David and I are so excited and can't wait to meet Ella Jane. We are so in love with her already!

A friend of mine is working on editing the video of the ultrasound I had today. I'll try to get it posted soon!

14 Weeks

10 Week Belly Pic

14 Week Belly Pic

Feels great to be coming out of the 1st Trimester. Our first milestone. I'm feeling baby move daily now. Not really kicks, just feels like baby is rolling around. We went to the high risk doc on Thursday and had an ultrasound. The tech couldn't confirm, but we are about 75% sure it is a girl. We saw 3 little white lines and no little boy parts were anywhere to be found....but we won't know for sure until my next appointment on the 26th. If we confirm that it is a girl at that time, I'll let you know the name we have chosen. We are so excited to have another child and it really is a blessing no matter if it is a boy or a girl.

I feel so different this pregnancy. Even though this is the third time I've made it this far, in some ways I feel like it's the first time I've been pregnant. I am so much more aware of every little thing. I think I just didn't really soak in every moment with my pregnancy with Noah and now I wish I had. So I'm not taking anything for granted. I told myself after I lost Noah that I would never complain of a pregnancy symptom again. That's a lot easier to say when you aren't pregnant! The nausea has been torcher. I think I am pretty well past the worst of that now. The injections aren't so bad most of the time, but sometimes they hurt really bad. Last night was a bad one and I had a bit of a break down. Sometimes I just get mad that I have to take them, but also mad that Noah could have been saved by them. Anyway, it's really not as bad as I thought it would be...taking an injection every night. It's more of an aggravation than anything.

Every day I am realizing how very blessed we are. It was a terrible tragedy we went through last year and we still grieve, but I know we should never take for granted the fact that we were able to get pregnant again as soon as we tried and that this baby is doing so well. And Ethan is such a miracle. We realize that now more than ever. I hurt so much for others who have never been able to conceive or who haven't conceived again since losing a child. My heart is broken for my brother and sister-in-law and all that they are going through. They are so gracious about it all. How very hard I know it is for them to have watched both of their sisters be pregnant while they plead with God every night to give them a child. I don't know or understand God's plan for them, but I have so much hope. I know they will make wonderful parents. They love their nephews so much. They loved Noah like their own. I can't even fathom the hurt they have experienced over the last several months and the realization that they cannot have a child without medical intervention or through adoption. They both have so much faith though and know that God hasn't forgotten them.

Ethan is at my mom's house for the week while he is on Fall Break. I miss him SO MUCH already!!! I know he is having a great time and will make some great memories...but I'm selfish and want him here with me all the time! :o)

I'm praying for so many of you who are pregnant with your rainbow babies or who have just recently had your rainbow babies. I know that when we have this baby we will be overcome with emotions we have never experienced before. That day can't come soon enough! And if you read Angela's blog you will notice that she and I are due the same day! April 3rd! :o) How fun!

Sometimes...

...it just feels like a dream. I miss you so much sweet boy.